Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Why does Meghan Markle seem to struggle with acceptance in Hollywood despite her royal title and celebrity connections?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

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I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Is it possible for the AfD to ever win the chancellorship in Germany?

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have complete contempt for traitorism

What is your first experience having sex with older men?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

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I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

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I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Why do atheists not love a G-d that does not stop punishing them harder and harder in this world and the next until they surrender to Him?

I see through liars

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

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I have a reading level above third grade

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

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I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

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I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Do all vehicles, including cars and SUVs, need to be lifted up on ramps in order to change the oil filter? If not, what is an alternative method for changing the oil filter without lifting the vehicle?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Are there any Indian wife swapping stories?

I can read

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t cotton to rapists

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I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I have complete contempt for fakery

What do you think about wearing sheer pantyhose?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I can count

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I understand how hurricane paths work

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I actually pay taxes

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t buy bullshit

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y